Begierde's Lovelyish

I feel fat, tired and ugly

Tue, 09 Mar 2010 16:38:53 GMT

The weather is so cold in France. Snow, frozen wind, and so is my skin... frozen. My nose is reddish, I caught a cold and feel so tired.

Today, I 'm wearing a big belt, like those in Japan's traditional outfit (Obi belt). It's pretty, but I wear it in a way of hidding my belly by compressing it under the fabric. I also have two big sweatshirt, a very long skirt... I can't be more hidden.

I feel fat

Feel like her.

Look like her by the way...

I feel as if I need to loose pounds and pounds. In fact, I'm not big. I'm not really fat at all. I'm around 17BMI, and I'm considered skinny. Well, I'm not.

I'm so stupid, and the first thing I did while I went back home was to eat chocolate cereals. Without being hungry. And now ? I'm thinking of eating. Well, I'll not eat until diner. I have to work( in fact I'm woring in a primary school and have to work at home for my studies...). But I can't stay concentrated on my work. My head is too heavy and I'm so disgusted of being like this today.

I feel stupid, I feel lazy, I feel bad.

How to have a nice skin ?

Sun, 07 Mar 2010 17:14:24 GMT

I have a fade complexion. Pale, as if I was sick. It's strange but I like it ! The problem is that I often get spots... red scars on a Snow White face, it's awful. I don't have so many, but it's annoying.

Every morning, I use a flower lotion(without alcool), then I use a cream for sensitive skins. No foundation cream, just Kohl and blush sometimes.
Every evening, I wash my face with a lotion or almond oil, and then with Alep soap. Then, I put on some cream because my skin is a bit dry.

Once a week , I use scrumbs or "clarifying" face-packs (soft one with cereals or rasoul), and I use at least one moisturizing face-pack (home made with shea butter or oils and honey).

Have you an idea of what I can change to elude spots or tiny red marks ?

Harder, faster, stronger

Sun, 21 Feb 2010 11:05:12 GMT

I'll try to work,
I'll try not to eat so much,
I'll try not to gain,
I'll try to be better,
I'll try to find my way,
I'll try to be myself,
I'll try not to stay desperate,
I'll try to kick my ass away from the counch...

I shave a part of my head [pictures]

Tue, 16 Feb 2010 18:14:26 GMT

Last friday, I decided to shave a part of my head my nape. I told my boyfriend, and surprisingly, he told me that it would be so beautiful !

So on monday...
This :

Became like that : Hair down :

Back :

Half of my friend and family think that it's awful, and the other half that it's pretty or not so bad.
I personnaly love, my boyfriend too !

Would you dare to do something like this one day?

"Silhouette"

Tue, 19 Jan 2010 10:57:12 GMT

I like making photograph, and being on photograph. Well, a bit narcissic, but I like the way we can make yourself looking good with a nice light, a nice background... and it's an image that cans till forever.

Now, I had an idea. I decided to have pictures of my "silhouette". So, My boyfriend made a shooting of myself and modified it to become this :

Do you like this kind of pictures ?

Some other (not of myself) to make you having an opinion.

news from myself: Concert, health, weight

Sat, 16 Jan 2010 18:18:23 GMT

Hello everybody !
Long time without coming here. I strated a new life that I expected to be better. On a certain manner it's the case. But some problem occurs (not enough work so not enough money , and I'm very tired...).
I'm so so tired now. I can't learn (my lessons), I can't make sport (because I faint when I try), I can't do anything;.. s I'm on internet, trying not to fall asleep, because I at my In law's and it's not fair to sleep when lunch time is comming.

I have lost weight during Christmas, my BMI was around 15. I was good at the moment, a bit tired but ok (picture of me with a corset at the end of the article was tken at that moment). Now that I have regain this weight to reach my "normal" weight (that is to say medical too low but good for me), I'm... well, I can say that I'm sick. Crapy. I hope that will be better soon,. I try to sleep more, to eat a bit more too.

SO. What's new that is better to tel you on lovelyish, except that I have a Zombi complexion?

1.Hum... New hair color ! That is a good thing. I trying to make my hair lighter/redder, and love it. Fire like!

2.Then, I have a picture with my second corset (from New Year's eve), so that you can see my work. I have sown this one during april/mai 2009. I made another in summer 2009, and maybe one more "lingerie" like soon. I love having a so tiny waist!

3.And lastly, we go to see RAMMSTEIN in concert in december. We were in front of the scene, just in frint of Till (singer). I finally faint (around 40degrees on the room + people crashing together on the crowd of 12,000people !).

So, There are some pictures of the Show !

Till(singer) with his mechanic wings (that make fire effects)

Till very close (I was just 2 or 3 meters from his feet, he is very very impressive! 1m93 for around 100kilos)

Flake (clavier) on the boat, held by the public !

Myself with my fan tshirt (well, i'm not ashamed to be fan of these guys)

I think I would go here more often soon, when I'll have retire more. I hope that you're all ok !

Muse Concert : Marvellous

Sat, 07 Nov 2009 21:12:42 GMT

It was on the 1st nivember 2009 : Muse Concert.
We were -me and my boyfriend-just in front of the scene, near Matthew Bellamy (the singer). It was very very marvellous, good music, good atmosphere... I wasn't fan of this group (my boyfriend and his bestfriend are fan for years), but I can say now that I really am.

And seeing Matthew Bellamy playing guitare just in front of me made me want to start learning how to play guitare (since I know how to sing already :p )!
So, my boyfriend has a guitare, he knows how to play.. and two days ago I start. Revelation, I'm not so bad, and I already can play some simple song ("Au Claire de La lune" "Happy Birthday"..).I made some music (only theory) when I was a child, and have piano knowledge (basics ones). It helps a lot ! So, now that I know how to place my hands and make notes, I must try to add some technic. And find something to heal my fingers, because playing guitare is very painful (but only in the beginning said my boyfriend).

Here is the guitare : a Silverstine fender (electric).

I must made a picture of the guitare I use tomorrow or later ^^

So, what's up ??

Halloween fail "funny" costums pic !

Fri, 30 Oct 2009 17:01:26 GMT

I wasn't here for a while, because I had to move. I'm now living in another part of my country-France- and I'm happy.
I continu to study, I have a little job (baby sitting à little Kosta, sweet 5 years old boy), I'm with my boyfriend and all my pets (two rats, a cat 3 aquariums).

So,just a little entry to speak about it. Sunday (we are still friday, 30th october in France, it's 6AM), I go to a concert of MUSE !

Here is a little song from their new Album :uprising

And for those who like Twilight (not my case) they are on the Original Band.(Belong to me).

And on Saturday ? Well, Halloween ! Some idea of costums (I will wear my corset and the skirt I sew personnaly, so nothing unusual for me !)

Ken Costume

Sailor Moon

Kitty-Vador

Enjoy !

QOTD :Include the mention "photoshopped" under pictures on magazines ?

Fri, 25 Sep 2009 16:20:07 GMT

Do you think that it could be a good idea to mentionned under a picture if it is photoshoped or not ?

It's an idea of a french politician (a woman). She proposed a law to impose this mention, in a way to preserve people from bad self estim concerning their physical appearance. I translate for you what she said :

"These pictures coul make people believing in this almost always fake reality"." It's not correct to make us thinking that 20 years old people are prettier than 70 years old. I want to re-built the border between reality and virtuality."

She didn't mention anorexia (she made the law to ban pro anorexia website a few years ago in France) or things like this, but just want to say that it's a general tendancy to show a fake reality.

What's your opinion ?

My new bag

Tue, 22 Sep 2009 20:13:56 GMT

My new bag is a strange one. It has an head, a queue, is fluffy. In fatc, it's a WWF bag !

Ok, I'm 21 years old... but according to the size of suspenders, it's not made for small children (since I wear the bag with suspender almost at the smaller size...). Can be strange too concerning my style, but not so strange for people knowing me.

But, no matter what others are thinking, I love my bag, and it's for a cause I support : protection of animals.

Do you have something odd like my bag that you love ?